I haven't written an article on amity in several years - how time flys. I want to discuss the different types of love that both excist and co-excist in longing and liaison. What is love - other
than oxytocin in the brain, there must be more to it than some organic compound. I will go through some of my personal experiences to shed some light on these clandestine anomalies.
What is love, really? Asking yourself, several answers may pop up in your head immediately, but are they real? Is our whole interpretation been corrupted? According to the Feldstein
Family Law Group based in Canada, in 2012, 46% of all marriages in the United States ended in divorce. Reasons range from a lack of communication, financial issues, to infidelity and
commonly, the younger the couple, the higher the statisitcs - of course.
Love, organically, is oxytocin produced by the pituitary gland in the brain. This chemical is released commonly as there is consensual contact between two individuals; long hugs,
cuddeling, stroking of the hair or even a simple kiss - it is why couples hold hands; it keeps the chemical in constant production. But as you can clearly see here, and recall the 46% divorce rates,
general marriages are chemically sustained like a plutonium-238 isotope (a ticking time bomb). Such a chemically-sustained relationship cannot manifest the correct actions and reactions
which, lets say, "real love", hences fourth; choices and actions. Our brains are literally organic supercomputers which produce concious equasions (thoughts and emotions) via chemicals.
Dance with me, will you? Our species is the only on Earth that use symbols and coherently create music and songs. As you know, most songs are driven by love and generally win the
charts as the feeling of love (oxytocin) is one of the most addictive and influencial chemicals that are produced, making love songs so popular as we can relate so well with these combinations
and rythoms representing our instinctive longing for this feeling. It is what drives us to write songs inspired by our significant other when there is an absense in contact.
Can you ENDURE? This is the dividing point which separates most relationships that end in divorce - it is something I've experienced myself growing up. When together, we
occasionally joke around telling each other the extent of one's love. "I would still love you even if you got into an accident and was paralyzed waist down", or things like, "I would still love you
even if I caught you in bed with like.. 12 different men!". Sure, we may say these things, but when the time comes, can we really be a man or woman of our word and endure?
Endurance is not just something you can work at, if that were the case, the divorce rate wouldn't be so depressingly vast. It takes a type of person to pull through, sacrofice, and keep
going; that 54% out there. You could say that marriage is like flipping a coin, any rational mature couple that achieved years of marriage will tell you that you can not completely trust your
What should I look for? Help me.. This goes back to endurance. Many people risk that almost a 50% chance when diving into marriage. 46% is a very high number, and as years go by, it
will surely raise in the future as it has continually in the past. Now for this topic, I'm going to disband the rythom of this article and be personal with you. So you long for "the one", correct?
Spending time and knowing the person, have they demonstrated endurance? An unconditional grasp? Such an aspect is difficult to define - so lets define it.
The "love" chemical must be absent yet still share an unconditional connection and longing for one another. Ladies and gentelmen, that is what true love is. You can re-read it as much
as you like and try to wrap your head around the concept. This is exactly why the most successful marriages are between two best friends. Pope Benedict XVI announced to almost half a million
people in the Celebration of Witnesses on June 3rd, 2012 that, "Factors help form strong marriages such as healthy friendships".
For myself, growing up, I was truely in love with a girl - it was self-evident because of all of the stress and pain I endured being separated nine-hundred miles and famlies hating each
other like Romeo and Juliet - tried hard every day to make her happy. I never once cursed at her, raised my voice or did her wrong; when needed she received my 100% attention. It didn't work on
the 4th year because when I stopped making long trips to visit and buying gifts, turned out she had no endurance at all when it was her turn to go through a hard time. If I had only looked for
the right things I would have known if she was "the one" or not. But this ended back in 2008 - five years ago.
What now? As I said in the second sentence of this article, there are different types of love that both excist and co-excist in longing and liaison; true love cannot be one-sided. Now, I'm
following my own advice; making friends, and keeping my eyes open for the right things - as you should too.